Greetings my people – and welcome to a lovely sunny spot in the garden where I am sure you will all be eagerly awaiting my latest pontifications. So here goes.
Many of my loyal followers will be familiar with the term ‘Spring Cleaning’. Although more usually applied to what ones Personal Piggy Palace goes through when it gets its annual big clean-up jobbie, this term could also be applied to some of us who enjoy our pampering a little more regularly.
First things first though. To ensure the maximum pampering quotient is achieved, only the very best is good enough. It isn’t good getting all fobbed off with any old shampoo, washing up liquid or such rubbish. Oh no, the very idea.
To save you the bother of wasting valuable salad munching time researching the subject all round the internet and everything, I can tell you here and now there is only ONE shampoo company good enough for me to risk my legendary good looks on – Gorgeous Guineas.
Yes Mummy – I do insist on checking the bottle first.
Hummm, now let me see – ‘Spring into Summer Easi Rinse shampoo‘. Five fold orange oil and lavender. A special edition too! That looks just the ticket.
Now we have that all sorted out, there is just the small matter of the water.
Steady as she goes Mummy – lower away. I just want to dip a toe in to test the temperature.
I said ‘DIP A TOE’ – not ‘DUNK THE PIGGY’!!!!
Actually, talking of toes – don’t forget they need lots of extra special pampering.
Ooooooooh – stop it – that tickles!
I like this bit – all lovely and luxurious. Any chance of a scritch too Mummy?
Awww – can’t I stay in here just a little while longer?
Be very careful not to rub me up the wrong way – Tee Hee!
That got most of the sploshy water off – time for that all important blow dry.
Oooooh, stop it Mummy – your causing such a draft around my, err . . . moving swiftly on.
Gosh all that beautification malarkey takes it out of you. Time for a swift relax.
Oh yes – this is the life. My fur feels even more all soft and silky than usual.
What was that shampoo called, mum? Spring Into Deckchair?! Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.