fairymagic.me

Everyone knows what a busy little bee I am, but my absolute favourite job has to be sending out parcels to my friends! Wrapping up a pressie in my own special logo-ed tissue paper, adding a personalised card and not forgetting a liberal sprinkle of special Fairy Magic and then imagining the parcel speeding off to its brand new home, where its arrival is eagerly anticipated, then it being ripped open and the glee at the contents – it has to be the best feeling ever, err after eating of course . . . and snoozing . . . oh and a jolly good back scritch . . .

It doesn’t seem like 5 minutes since I was busy packing up a load of my button badges destined for all my fans living in far flung places around the globe. Oh, such is the hectic life of an international celebrity piggy.

I am packing all these super-dooper piggy plaque things today. They are rather good – ‘A House Is Not A Home Without A Guinea Pig And a Fridge Full Of Salad’! Err, what did you say there, Mummy – ‘it is more like a bit of peace and quiet’!?

Actually, Mummy helps with the hard packing type work. I supervise, generally telling her what to do next and just exactly  where to stick the stamps. Those stamps taste really icky. It’s just a thought but you wonder why they are not lettuce flavoured. Hum, maybe I could write to the Head Of Stamps at Royal Mail – and if he or she is reading this then take note please!

Gosh, packing can get very complicated – my poor little brain is getting very over-worked.

Perhaps a little nap in this cosy box will be just the thing, before I have to go to the Post Office.

Hello Mr Postman-Bear Sir. I’d like to despatch some parcels; First Class please.

Mummy was extra very busy today so I had to wrap this last one myself. It is a lovely food parcel especially for my friend, Snoopy. You can tell I packed it personally because it is wrapped so beautifully neat and tidy.

Whaddya you mean, ‘It’s too heavy’?

There can never be enough freshly grown grass in a parcel. I picked it myself from the latest batch of the freshest Grow-It-Yourself-Grass, choosing each blade with tender care, testing each verdant leaf for plumpness and juiciness and chompability.

Oh, that might be all well and good – but it is still too heavy then?!

Let’s be having a closer look. I need to get my thinking cap on here.

Hum . . . perhaps if I were to neaten the ends a little bit.

Nommm, nomm, burp – pardon! nomm, nomm . . .

Hummph, perhaps we might have overdone stuffing the grass in the parcel a little tiny bit.

Mummy must have put some extra in when I wasn’t looking. I couldn’t possibly have got it wrong!

It doesn’t matter though, it means I get to have an extra snack in between . . . err . . . other snacks.

Right, that looks a lot better. Lets try it again on those scales of yours, Mr Postman-Pat Bear.

Perfect! Now, where did I put my stamps?

I am sure Snoopy will be as pleased as punch with her parcel.

Err, I’ll just tidy away these stray bits before I go! I don’t mind, it’s all in a days work.

Home James, and time for a restorative snack!

Now then Marigold and Mariella, hold your horses – leave a little bit of that stamp flavoured greenery for me!

That grass growing experiment we did recently went very well. The only problem being that there wasn’t quite enough to grow round, so to speak. Actually, there might well have been if Mariella had been put on a strict diet. I know, I was the only one who thought she should be on one! Anyway, we have decided that the only logical solution is to step-up grass growing production dramatically. The other day we took delivery of of some extra large bulk packs of seeds in readiness!

Here we are at The Grass Growing Manufactory and it’s action stations, all paws on deck, and other urgent sounding phrases!

As you can see, the first batch has germinated and is looking to be in fine fettle.

Daddy says that, according to the directions, the grass has to grow to 150 ‘something’s’ before it is ready. Humph – I don’t think I can be quite 150 something’s, but I certainly am ready!

Here we are at the first measuring event.

Lower away . . . steady . . . to me a bit . . . to you . . . hold it there . . .

Now let me see – it says ‘3’. Crikey, that’s another ‘147’ to go!!!!! This is going to take ages.

Daddy, are you sure that measuring device thingy hasn’t stretched?

Oh well, suppose we had better wait a bit longer – it doesn’t say anything in the directions about not being allowed a crafty sample munch or two though!

Perhaps it is time for a little bit of Fairy Magic, to help speed things along a little.

Here it is, sprinkled with my Magical Fairy Drops – they will certainly help to get it growing quickly!

Ha – they worked a treat! Looks to me like at least 200 something’s – lets get measuring.

Wow – 150 munches exactly! Looks like Daddy even managed to get the measuring thingy planted properly too.

Err, does anybody know where the exit is?

If somebody doesn’t give me a hand in a moment, I will have to eat my way out!

Now then everybody – stand aside, it is time to welcome the honoured guest (me) to the Grand Grass Opening Ceremony.

Ladies and Gentleman, Piggies and . . . err, other Piggies – Taaa-raaa-raa-raaa, I hereby declare this Tray of Grass . . officially . . . wait for it Marigold . . . OPEN!

Okay then, you can start to tuck-in now.

Oi! Don’t bite off more than you can chew, Mariella – there’s plenty for everyone!

Thanks Fairy, nom, nom, nom, burp oops pardon! This might keep us going until teatime.

Well that was jolly good while it lasted – which wasn’t quite as long as I would have wished.

Marigold and Mariella had better start working lots of overtime to ensure I have a regular crop!

You’d think everyone would have cottoned on to this ‘Grow-It-Yourself-Grass’ malarkey – it’s the bees knees! Or should that be the piggies whiskers?!

Many thanks to Gorgeous Guineas and Planet Guinea for supplying more seeds for advanced testing – they were just the ticket!

Grow-It-Yourself-Grass Seeds are available to buy in the UK from Planet Guinea (contact Karen at Guinea Pig Welfare if you are unable to order online). Similar yummy grass products may be found locally worldwide. If you can recommend a reliable source, please let me know and we will be happy to add a link right here on Fairy’s Blog.

Hello my people. I am often asked by someone, what is the ideal number of piggy’s in a household? Well, we were given a present of this super-dooper, attractive sign thing by my piggy-daddy, Ernie, the other day. And, by jingo, it’s just the job for helping me to answer that very important question.

Take a quick gander at my present – what do you reckon then?

In my opinion, which is well known for always being right, THREE piggies per home is the optimum quantity!

When it comes to that all important subject of food, for example, a large helping of salad can be easily spit up into three fair share piggy portions of a half each – biggest half for me, and then half each of what’s left over for the other two piggies. There is a very useful tried a trusted formula you can use. I’ll share it with you here:

Let food = T, Piggies = 3 and Home = 1

Then, Portion = (T/3 + 1)(Fairy x lots)/(T – 1/2) = mine

Or something like that anyway. It’s probably too complicated for you to grasp.

Moving swiftly on. Come on now, you two, time for a quick group photo. Look at the camera thingy and say ‘grass’!

He he! That went very well! What do you reckon Mariella? Oh! Are you feeling a bit tired?? Well, just rest your chins there a while and maybe it would be best if you didn’t eat anything at all for an hour or two – get your strength up for supper later on.
Keep you fur on Marigold – you can have a go up here in a minute, while I go get my tea!